Learning to live
by Samandjackforever
Summary: yes you live a lie! MarkRoger


Summary- "Yes you live a lie!"

A/N- Mentions rape, and its slash. Rating for Marks mouth!

Disclaimer- Yet, again I don't own the characters of RENT, John Larson does!

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Learning to live

Mark couldn't believe what he was hearing, roger turning on him. Telling him that he lives a lie, that he's sad and lonely. Unbelievable!

Mark couldn't handle it. Maybe Roger really did love Mimi. 'Damn!' Mark thought as tears weld up in his eyes and then it happened Mark lost it, all those emotions he had to bottle up to be strong for his small group of friends, had just let lose.

"Roger shut the FUCK up!" Mark yelled. "How DARE you tell me that I live a lie! That I'm sad and lonely! And why the HELL should you care where Mimi goes! You said yourself you had no feelings for her when you saw her trying to get better but then going right back to smack. You think SHE loves you! If you want love then all these past YEARS you should of looked to the person standing at your side! Or did you forget who that was? Well let me refresh your memory Roger, that person was ME!" Mark yelled as the tears that where weld up in his eyes fell freely.

Roger just looked at mark as he broke down. Mark closed his eyes in grief and then said, "I always loved you Roger but, you know what if you want to follow Mimi go ahead but when you come back I WON'T be here!" Mark yelled as he stormed out of the cemetery.

_Later on….._

Mark didn't go back to the loft; he knew Roger would be there because he feels bad for what he said. "How could he do such a thing!" Mark asked no one.

He started to walk down an ally. "Hey, good looking." A voice called from behind him, mark didn't pay any attention to the voice and just kept on walking.

"Want big daddy to show you a good time, come on boys." The voice called and at the end of the ally two men appeared and grabbed mark "oh shit!" was all mark could say before they held him down as he was brutally beaten and raped, then they left him in the alleyway.

Mark tried to get up, mark felt a sharp pain in his gut as he tried to stand, they stabbed him. Just then mark fell forward and passed out completely.

Mark remained passed out all night and well into the morning. Collins was doing his morning walk looking down alleyways for the homeless people, everyday he would count how many homeless people there and complain about it. One alleyway had the eerie sent of blood in the air and then he saw mark. "Oh my god Mark!" He ran over to over to mark's side within seconds; he was lying on his stomach Collins turned him over and saw the wound.

Marks complexion was pale, his cloths were ripped and Collins knew by the other bruises that he was raped. So, Collins carried him to the hospital and called Roger who came racing to the hospital at full speed.

When Roger entered Marks room, his jaw dropped, mark was hooked up to a heart monitor and had a breathing tube shoved down his throat with two IV's in his right arm. "Roger?" Collins called him but he didn't seem to hear him all he could do was stare a mark. "Rog!" Collins yelled and Roger snapped out of his daze.

"What happened?" Roger asked. "I found him passed out in an alleyway, but the way I found him in, uh roger I think he was raped." Collins said calmly.

Roger stood there dumbfounded. "My god," Roger said under his breath, "This is my fault." Roger said wanting to kick himself. "How?" Collins asked shocked. "Me and Mark had a fight in the cemetery, I said some things that I regret and I waited at the loft for him but I started to worry about him and I was just going to go look for him when you called." Roger exclaimed.

Collins looked a roger then back at mark and saw marks hand twitch. "Mark? You waking up?" Collins said as he touched marks shoulder.

Just then mark started swatting at anything that came in his reach. He started coughing because of the tube in his throat. Collins called a nurse and she removed the tube and left.

As soon as the nurse left mark started screaming at the top of his lungs all the words he meant to say during the rape. "Please stop, don't touch me! Roger! Help me, Oh god please HELP ME! ROGER!" Mark yelled and that tore Rogers heart apart. "Mark, wake up Mark! MARK!" roger yelled his voice fell upon deaf ears roger thought and then said, "I hear mark they can't hurt you as long as you have my hand." Roger said calmly stroking his forehead.

Marks eyes shot open, "Roger!" Mark exclaimed, and then calmed down and said, "get the fuck away from me!" Mark yelled. "Listen mark, I'm sorry I was mad I didn't mean the things I said, I don't love Mimi I was worried for her, I love you and I always have." Roger reasoned, mark looked at him with a watery smile.

Mark looked around and noticed, finally, that he was in a hospital. Mark hates and fears hospitals, to him they were a place of death. Mark began to panic so he took hold of roger and pleaded with him, "Roger can we go home please take me away from here!" Mark begged.

Roger looked at Collins who was sitting in a chair closest to the window. Collins gave him the 'tell him' look. "Mark, listen I have ask you something, what's the last thing you remember before you passed out?" Roger asked mark. Mark sat up and look at the guitarist dead in the eye and said, "I remember being mad, but I'm not mad anymore. I do remember what those fuck-heads in the ally did to me, they raped me and beat me and left me for dead." Mark said calmly.

After that mark sat there for a minute before shaking slightly. Tears formed in his eyes as he put a hand on Rogers hand and said, "I was scared, I couldn't, I just couldn't stop them, I tried, and I tried so hard to brake free. Oh god," mark said disgustedly closing his eyes and tilting his head back slightly, he was fully sitting up cress-cross on the bed. There was a knock on the door, it was the doctor.

"Um, excuse me, Mr. Cohen, we have found out through test results, the man that raped you has HIV, I'm sorry to tell you this but, you have been infected with HIV." The doctor said, and then he left. "Crappy doctor!" Collins yelled after the doctor.

"Mark you Ok?" Roger asked mark turning around to look at him. Mark sat there silent for a minute and then he looked at roger. Tears formed in Rogers eyes. "What are you crying about?" Mark asked. "You got HIV, you been handed your death sentence!" Roger exclaimed. "I won't be alone though." Mark said as he kissed Roger fully on the lips.

A/N- Well what did you think? I'll only update if I get a lot of reviews! I love Reviews they're fun!

Mark- Also if you don't review I'll never get out of the hospital!

Roger- I'll never get laid!

Mark- Rog, is that all you care about?

Roger-No, I care about you!

Both- PLEASE REVIEW!


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